If I Can't Successfully Google You, You Must Not Be Important
I'm obsessed with google. Obsessed. I use it for absolutely everything--including my masters thesis research. I don't even use a dictionary anymore, 'cause if I don't know how to spell something, I type it into google and it corrects me if I'm wrong with the fabulous 'did you mean ___________?' feature. But of more import is its capacity as an incredible stalking device. Now, I know some of you are saying 'wow, you're a freak', but ADMIT IT! Anytime any of you have met someone that you think is interesting, you google them. I know I do. And when I say 'interesting', I don't mean that you're looking to bump uglies with them, perverts. Besides, I stopped googling potential dates when Nate came along (Nate the Great). 'Interesting' could just be a really cool prof, or a tool of a prof for that matter, or a person you met at a party who you're a little curious about. Or someone who you think is lying to you, and you wanna check the facts.
But now, I fear that google is becoming another one of those shitty measures in society that we stack ourselves up against and usually come out feeling bad because of, kinda like the clothing sizes at Club Monaco. You see, now that everyone knows about googling other people, we all think that we have to have several links that are really 'ours' if someone is to perform a google search on us; for, if we don't, then in no way can we be distinguished academically, or in our careers, or active, contributing members of society. In other words, we can't really be that 'important' if we can't be googled.
I can't tell you how many times people have said in either a desperate or defeated tone, 'I googled myself and nothing came up.' And what's worse is that you can't really get yourself on google--you actually do have to do some/be involved in pretty important shit for people to write about you online in any kind of authorative capacity.
Perhaps it's all a huge conspiracy concocted so as to get people into action, but I say fuck it! This is clearly a measure of informal social control that encourages people to do all sorts of 'stuff' just so they can have their egos stroked by seeing their name online; it's a twisted little bit of fame, really. And I used to buy into it, but I'm out. I'm going to continue to spend my days half-assedly writing my thesis while intermittently publishing on this site that nobody probably reads anyway, tossing that up with a little Law and Order: SVU, original Degrassi and after school specials that we now get on our massive 900 channel cable package, and the occassional phone call to my parents or Kaitie.
And you wanna know why? 'Cause nobody probably googles me, anyway.
But now, I fear that google is becoming another one of those shitty measures in society that we stack ourselves up against and usually come out feeling bad because of, kinda like the clothing sizes at Club Monaco. You see, now that everyone knows about googling other people, we all think that we have to have several links that are really 'ours' if someone is to perform a google search on us; for, if we don't, then in no way can we be distinguished academically, or in our careers, or active, contributing members of society. In other words, we can't really be that 'important' if we can't be googled.
I can't tell you how many times people have said in either a desperate or defeated tone, 'I googled myself and nothing came up.' And what's worse is that you can't really get yourself on google--you actually do have to do some/be involved in pretty important shit for people to write about you online in any kind of authorative capacity.
Perhaps it's all a huge conspiracy concocted so as to get people into action, but I say fuck it! This is clearly a measure of informal social control that encourages people to do all sorts of 'stuff' just so they can have their egos stroked by seeing their name online; it's a twisted little bit of fame, really. And I used to buy into it, but I'm out. I'm going to continue to spend my days half-assedly writing my thesis while intermittently publishing on this site that nobody probably reads anyway, tossing that up with a little Law and Order: SVU, original Degrassi and after school specials that we now get on our massive 900 channel cable package, and the occassional phone call to my parents or Kaitie.
And you wanna know why? 'Cause nobody probably googles me, anyway.
posted by Soci Womyn at 3:08 PM
1 Comments:
HA HA HA! You are so hillarious! I think you should seriously consider becoming a travelling sociological comic! Seriously, you could visit sociology departments around the world and share your brilliantly witty reflections and insights about these issues with the many sociologists that need a little 'lightening up' (and all other academics for that matter).
Damn you're funny! And I miss you like crazy!
I haven't read your 'stats = life' blog yet, but I'm really excited! (I just finished telling my students how last night I was dreaming that my cat would have to stop meowing because she didn't have an accurate regression model! Guess we're stats geeks fo' life!)
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